{"id":4105,"date":"2011-11-26T19:02:22","date_gmt":"2011-11-26T18:02:22","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.cestanahoru.org\/?p=4105"},"modified":"2011-11-26T19:02:22","modified_gmt":"2011-11-26T18:02:22","slug":"rust-v-oblasti-mezilidskych-vztahu","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.cestanahoru.org\/?p=4105","title":{"rendered":"R\u016fst v oblasti mezilidsk\u00fdch vztah\u016f"},"content":{"rendered":"

Na\u0161e mezilidsk\u00e9 vztahy z\u00edsk\u00e1vaj\u00ed na kvalit\u011b do t\u00e9 m\u00edry, nakolik se v\u00a0nich odr\u00e1\u017e\u00ed Je\u017e\u00ed\u0161ovo jedn\u00e1n\u00ed, pro\u017e\u00edv\u00e1n\u00ed a postoje.<\/em><\/p>\n

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Zku\u0161enost v\u00a0oblasti mezilidsk\u00fdch vztah\u016f p\u0159edstavuje jednu ze z\u00e1kladn\u00edch rovin definice psychick\u00e9 zralosti ur\u010dit\u00e9 osoby a z\u00e1rove\u0148 n\u00e1m ukazuj\u00ed jej\u00ed pokrok ve schopnosti milovat, co\u017e je podstatou svatosti.[1]<\/a> Je tedy jasn\u00e9, \u017ee zp\u016fsob, jak pro\u017e\u00edv\u00e1me mezilidsk\u00e9 vztahy m\u016f\u017ee b\u00fdt dobr\u00fdm podn\u011btem pro ka\u017edodenn\u00ed zpytov\u00e1n\u00ed sv\u011bdom\u00ed a jeden z\u00a0d\u016fle\u017eit\u00fdch prvk\u016f, kter\u00e9 n\u00e1m pom\u00e1haj\u00ed pom\u011b\u0159ovat n\u00e1\u0161 duchovn\u00ed pokrok. <\/p>\n

Vztahy ka\u017ed\u00e9ho z\u00a0n\u00e1s pochopiteln\u011b zahrnuj\u00ed r\u016fzn\u00e1 prost\u0159ed\u00ed: rodinu, spole\u010denstv\u00ed, p\u0159\u00e1telstv\u00ed atp., jsou ovlivn\u011bny n\u011bkter\u00fdmi d\u011bdi\u010dn\u00fdmi faktory a velkou \u0159adou r\u016fznorod\u00fdch zku\u0161enost\u00ed, kter\u00fdmi n\u00e1s poznamenalo prost\u0159ed\u00ed, ve kter\u00e9m \u017eijeme. Z\u00e1rove\u0148 jsou v\u0161ak na\u0161e zku\u0161enosti v\u00a0oblasti vztah\u016f utv\u00e1\u0159eny \u00fasil\u00edm, kter\u00e9 neust\u00e1le vkl\u00e1d\u00e1me do toho, jak se chov\u00e1me v\u016f\u010di lidem, s\u00a0nimi\u017e se setk\u00e1v\u00e1me. C\u00edl takov\u00e9 snahy je mo\u017en\u00e9 shrnout do podtitulu na\u0161eho \u010dl\u00e1nku \u2013 jde o \u017eivotn\u00ed program, kter\u00fd vy\u017eaduje vnit\u0159n\u00ed bd\u011blost, pokoru, sebeovl\u00e1d\u00e1n\u00ed, vytrvalost.<\/p>\n

V\u00a0n\u00e1sleduj\u00edc\u00ed \u00favaze se pokus\u00edme p\u0159ipomenout n\u011bkolik podm\u00ednek, kter\u00e9 mohou usnadnit dosa\u017een\u00ed tohoto c\u00edle.<\/p>\n

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Pohled up\u0159en\u00fd na Krista<\/strong><\/p>\n

V\u00a0prv\u00e9 \u0159ad\u011b je t\u0159eba m\u00edt krit\u00e9rium, kter\u00fdm bychom mohli pom\u011b\u0159ovat, jak zdrav\u011b \u017e\u00edt mezilidsk\u00e9 vztahy. Za toto krit\u00e9rium nelze pova\u017eovat jednodu\u0161e \u201edobr\u00e9 mravy\u201c, kter\u00e9 jsou v\u017edy spojeny se zvyklostmi typick\u00fdmi pro ur\u010ditou kulturu a dobu. Pro k\u0159es\u0165any je hlavn\u00edm\u00a0 m\u011b\u0159\u00edtkem, j\u00edm\u017e pom\u011b\u0159uj\u00ed sv\u00e9 vztahy Je\u017e\u00ed\u0161 Kristus. Na\u0161e mezilidsk\u00e9 vztahy jsou natolik kvalitn\u00ed, nakolik se v\u00a0nich odr\u00e1\u017e\u00ed Je\u017e\u00ed\u0161ovo jedn\u00e1n\u00ed a postoje.<\/p>\n

Je\u017e\u00ed\u0161 se toti\u017e zd\u00e1 b\u00fdt \u010dlov\u011bkem, v\u00a0n\u011bm\u017e lidstv\u00ed dos\u00e1hlo sv\u00e9ho vrcholu; v\u00a0n\u011bm nach\u00e1z\u00edme v\u0161echno, co je na \u010dlov\u011bku kr\u00e1sn\u00e9:[2]<\/a> velkodu\u0161nost i pokoru, \u017eivotn\u00ed s\u00edlu i n\u011bhu, naprostou svobodu i ochotu k\u00a0vydanosti Otci i brat\u0159\u00edm, velk\u00fd smysl pro p\u0159\u00e1telstv\u00ed i schopnost sn\u00e1\u0161et samotu, hlubok\u00e9 spole\u010denstv\u00ed s\u00a0Bohem i s\u00a0chud\u00fdmi a h\u0159\u00ed\u0161n\u00edky, znalost lidsk\u00e9ho nitra, duchovn\u00edch my\u0161lenky i schopnost vyjad\u0159ovat se jednodu\u0161e. Jde o mimo\u0159\u00e1dnou osobnost jak z\u00a0hlediska toho, k\u00fdm byl, tak proto, co u\u010dil. Nenajdeme u n\u011bj vychytralost a taktizov\u00e1n\u00ed. Nikdy s\u00a0druh\u00fdm \u010dlov\u011bkem nemanipuluje, respektuje jeho svobodu. V\u00edc ne\u017e dobr\u00fd organiz\u00e1tor je \u010dlov\u011bkem, kter\u00fd vyza\u0159uje autoritu a je druh\u00fdmi vyhled\u00e1v\u00e1m.<\/p>\n

Evangelium Je\u017e\u00ed\u0161e p\u0159edstavuje uprost\u0159ed r\u016fzn\u00fdch typ\u016f vztah\u016f s\u00a0r\u016fzn\u00fdmi osobami: utv\u00e1\u0159\u00ed vztahy s\u00a0mu\u017ei i \u017eenami, s\u00a0dosp\u011bl\u00fdmi i d\u011btmi, prost\u00fdmi lidmi i u\u010denci, ctnostn\u00fdmi lidmi i h\u0159\u00ed\u0161n\u00edky, s\u00a0v\u00fdznamn\u00fdmi osobami i s\u00a0chud\u00e1ky. Jako Moj\u017e\u00ed\u0161 je \u010dlov\u011bkem \u201evelk\u00fdch z\u00e1stup\u016f\u201c, ale tak\u00e9 schopn\u00fd osobn\u00edch a na konkr\u00e9tn\u00edho \u010dlov\u011bka zam\u011b\u0159en\u00fdch setk\u00e1n\u00ed. Vych\u00e1z\u00ed lidem vst\u0159\u00edc s\u00a0velkou otev\u0159enost\u00ed, nem\u00e1 vlastn\u00ed p\u0159\u00edbytek, je pln\u00fd touhy pom\u00e1hat pot\u0159ebn\u00fdm, je chopen soucitu. Z\u00e1rove\u0148 \u017eije v\u00a0ur\u010dit\u00e9 osam\u011blosti: nikdo nen\u00ed schopen mu zcela porozum\u011bt, nesv\u011b\u0159uje druh\u00fdm ka\u017edou bol\u00edstku, nechce po nich rady, co m\u00e1 ud\u011blat.<\/p>\n

Evangelia zobrazuj\u00ed tak\u00e9 celou \u0159adu Je\u017e\u00ed\u0161ov\u00fdch velmi r\u016fznorod\u00fdch vnit\u0159n\u00edch postoj\u016f a emoc\u00ed: soucit a vst\u0159\u00edcnou pozornost v\u016f\u010di druh\u00e9mu \u010dlov\u011bku, radost i bolest, hn\u011bv, m\u00edrnost, pokoru, klid\u2026 Je pohnut k\u00a0slz\u00e1m, pl\u00e1\u010de. Nep\u016fsob\u00ed chladn\u011b a nez\u00fa\u010dastn\u011bn\u011b, tv\u00e1\u0159\u00ed v\u00a0tv\u00e1\u0159 druh\u00e9mu je vst\u0159\u00edcn\u00fd. Vyza\u0159uje pokoj, nep\u016fsob\u00ed na druh\u00e9 schv\u00e1cen\u011b nebo jako \u010dlov\u011bk pln\u00fd starost\u00ed, nevid\u00edme u n\u011bj \u017e\u00e1dn\u00e9 stopy psychick\u00e9 lability. \u017d\u00e1dn\u00e1 melancholie, kter\u00e1 je roz\u0161\u00ed\u0159en\u00fdm neduhem zbo\u017en\u00fdch lid\u00ed; p\u016fsob\u00ed jako zcela zdrav\u00fd a psychicky vyrovnan\u00fd \u010dlov\u011bk, kter\u00fd m\u00e1 sv\u016fj \u017eivot v\u00a0rukou. Co n\u00e1s na n\u011bm m\u016f\u017ee upoutat nejv\u00edce je jeho dobrota: tr\u00e1pen\u00ed druh\u00e9ho \u010dlov\u011bka ho nenech\u00e1v\u00e1 chladn\u00fdm, zvl\u00e1\u0161tn\u00ed starost m\u00e1 o lidi chud\u00e9, nemocn\u00e9, d\u011bti, h\u0159\u00ed\u0161n\u00edky.<\/p>\n

Je velmi aktivn\u00ed a zam\u011bstnan\u00fd, ale sou\u010dasn\u011b je schopen naj\u00edt \u010das k\u00a0odpo\u010dinku. Nevyhled\u00e1v\u00e1 potlesk a z\u00e1\u0159i reflektor\u016f. Ukazuje, \u017ee je odv\u00e1\u017en\u011b osvobozen\u00fd od \u010dist\u011b osobn\u00edch z\u00e1jm\u016f, od z\u00e1kona, od rodinn\u00fdch pout, od v\u011bc\u00ed. Nenech\u00e1v\u00e1 se podmi\u0148ovat soudy druh\u00fdch lid\u00ed, neupou\u0161t\u00ed od sv\u00e9ho c\u00edle a sv\u00e9 my\u0161lenky vyjad\u0159uje jasn\u011b.<\/p>\n

Okolnosti, kter\u00e9 napom\u00e1haj\u00ed vytv\u00e1\u0159et dobr\u00e9 vztahy<\/strong><\/p>\n

To, zda m\u00e1me lidi, kte\u0159\u00ed n\u00e1s p\u0159ij\u00edmaj\u00ed a maj\u00ed n\u00e1s r\u00e1di, z\u00e1le\u017e\u00ed na n\u00e1s samotn\u00fdch mnohem v\u00edce ne\u017e by se mohlo zd\u00e1t. Na\u0161e vztahy jsou do velk\u00e9 m\u00edry ovlivn\u011bny pozornost\u00ed, kterou v\u011bnujeme \u010di nikoliv ur\u010dit\u00fdm podm\u00ednk\u00e1m dobr\u00fdch vztah\u016f. N\u011bkter\u00e9 nyn\u00ed zm\u00edn\u00edm.<\/p>\n

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Dostate\u010dn\u011b zral\u00e1 a vyrovnan\u00e1 osobnost<\/em><\/p>\n

M\u00edn\u00ed se t\u00edm, \u017ee po du\u0161evn\u00ed str\u00e1nce fungujeme v\u00edcem\u00e9n\u011b \u201enorm\u00e1ln\u011b\u201c. Normalita ov\u0161em zahrnuje celou \u0159adu aspekt\u016f a kvalit, kter\u00e9 se mohou postupn\u011b vylep\u0161ovat d\u00edky trp\u011bliv\u00e9 a st\u00e1l\u00e9 pr\u00e1ci na sob\u011b sam\u00fdch (askezi). Je to z\u00e1kladn\u00ed podm\u00ednka, kter\u00e1 umo\u017e\u0148uje pozitivn\u00ed setk\u00e1n\u00ed s\u00a0druh\u00fdmi lidmi. Tento typ zralost zahrnuje nap\u0159.:<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 sebeporozum\u011bn\u00ed (schopnost navazovat kontakt s\u00a0t\u00edm, co pro\u017e\u00edv\u00e1m)<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 emotivn\u00ed jistota a sebep\u0159ijet\u00ed<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 realistick\u00e9 vn\u00edm\u00e1n\u00ed toho, kdo jsem, i realistick\u00e9 vn\u00edm\u00e1n\u00ed sv\u011bta<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 postupn\u00e9 p\u0159ekon\u00e1n\u00ed egocentrick\u00e9ho postoje (narcisismu) a zach\u00e1zen\u00ed s\u00a0frustracemi<\/p>\n

–\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 p\u0159ij\u00edm\u00e1n\u00ed skute\u010dnosti.<\/p>\n

Existuj\u00ed tak\u00e9 ur\u010dit\u00e9 procesy, kter\u00e9 dobr\u00fdm a srde\u010dn\u00fdm mezilidsk\u00fdm vztah\u016fm p\u0159\u00edli\u0161 nepom\u00e1haj\u00ed, jako nap\u0159. sklon k\u00a0p\u0159ehnan\u00e9mu negativismu a racionalizaci, \u00fat\u011bk od skute\u010dnosti, nekontrolovan\u00e1 impulsivita, nutkav\u00e1 pot\u0159eba souhlasu ze strany druh\u00fdch, siln\u00fd narcisismus, sklon k\u00a0vytv\u00e1\u0159en\u00ed negativn\u00edho sebeobrazu.<\/p>\n

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P\u00e9\u010de o vnit\u0159n\u00ed \u017eivot<\/em><\/p>\n

Vztah k\u00a0druh\u00e9mu je obohacuj\u00edc\u00ed a uspokojiv\u00fd do t\u00e9 m\u00edry, nakolik sami m\u00e1me ur\u010dit\u00e9 vnit\u0159n\u00ed bohatstv\u00ed a nakolik dok\u00e1\u017eeme b\u00fdt citliv\u00ed. M\u00e1me druh\u00fdm vych\u00e1zet vst\u0159\u00edc z\u00a0u\u0161lechtil\u00fdch a hodnotn\u00fdch pohnutek, nikoliv z\u00a0nutkav\u00e9 pot\u0159eby mezilidsk\u00fdch kontakt\u016f, ani ze strachu z\u00a0osam\u011blosti, z\u00a0\u00fazkosti, z\u00a0je\u0161itnosti \u010di egoismu, ale m\u011bla by n\u00e1s za druh\u00fdmi lidmi v\u00e9st na\u0161e dobrota a citlivost, touha d\u00e1vat a p\u0159ij\u00edmat. K\u00a0tomu je zapot\u0159eb\u00ed pe\u010dovat o n\u00e1\u0161 vnit\u0159n\u00ed sv\u011bt, aby na\u0161e vztahy byly obohacuj\u00edc\u00ed a d\u016fle\u017eit\u00e9 pro n\u00e1s i pro druh\u00e9. Josef Ratzinger k\u00a0tomu podot\u00fdk\u00e1: \u201eSchopnost v\u00e9st vnit\u0159n\u00ed \u017eivot, v\u011bt\u0161\u00ed otev\u0159enost k\u00a0duchovn\u00edm v\u011bcem, \u017eivotn\u00ed styl, kter\u00fd dok\u00e1\u017ee poodstoupit od hluku a toho, co se n\u00e1s sna\u017e\u00ed pohltit, to v\u0161e by m\u011blo pat\u0159it mezi na\u0161e priority\u2026 Jestli\u017ee chceme b\u00fdt k\u00a0sob\u011b up\u0159\u00edmn\u00ed, \u017eijeme v\u00a0dob\u011b, kter\u00e1 klade velk\u00fd d\u016fraz na image a sou\u010dasn\u011b je v\u00a0\u010dlov\u011bku velmi oslaben\u00e1 jeho vnit\u0159n\u00ed s\u00edla.\u201c[3]<\/a> Zm\u00edn\u011bn\u00e1 priorita vnit\u0159n\u00edho \u017eivota tvo\u0159\u00ed pot\u0159ebn\u00fd p\u0159edpoklad k\u00a0tomu, abychom unikli banalit\u011b \u0159ady na\u0161ich rozhovor\u016f, zbyte\u010dnosti a povrchnosti \u0159ady setk\u00e1n\u00ed, pomlouva\u010dn\u00e9mu a pr\u00e1zdn\u00e9mu mluven\u00ed. St\u00e1le p\u0159itom plat\u00ed biblick\u00fd v\u00fdrok, kte\u0159\u00ed \u0159\u00edk\u00e1 \u201eMezi nerozumn\u00fdmi \u0161et\u0159i sv\u00fdm<\/em> \u010dasem, mezi p\u0159em\u00fd\u0161liv\u00fdmi prodl\u00e9vej bez p\u0159est\u00e1n\u00ed\u201c.<\/p>\n

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Naj\u00edt si \u010das<\/em><\/p>\n

M\u011bli bychom se vyhnout tomu, aby se n\u00e1\u0161 \u017eivot neust\u00e1le kamsi \u0159\u00edtil v\u00a0\u0161\u00edlen\u00e9m rytmu a zpomalit, naj\u00edt si \u010das pro to, abychom mohli pozorn\u00ed v\u016f\u010di druh\u00fdm, naslouchat jim (pom\u011brn\u011b vz\u00e1cn\u00e1 \u010dinnost). P\u0159edpokl\u00e1d\u00e1 to schopnost stanovit si, co je v\u00a0na\u0161em \u017eivot\u011b prioritou, inteligentn\u011b pl\u00e1novat vlastn\u00ed aktivity a pova\u017eovat vn\u00edmavost a \u00factu k\u00a0druh\u00fdm lidem za d\u016fle\u017eitou hodnotu. \u201e\u017dijeme ve spole\u010dnosti, kter\u00e1 vyvol\u00e1v\u00e1 dojem, \u017ee ka\u017ed\u00fd okam\u017eik mus\u00ed b\u00fdt napln\u011bn\u00fd n\u011bjakou \u010dinnost\u00ed, akc\u00ed, zvukem, \u010dasto nezb\u00fdv\u00e1 \u010das na prost\u00e9 naslouch\u00e1n\u00ed a dialog\u2026 K\u00e9\u017e bychom se neb\u00e1li venku i uvnit\u0159 ml\u010det.\u201c[4]<\/a> Ticho, samota, klid \u2013 to jsou cesty k\u00a0ponoru do hloubky na\u0161eho nitra a sou\u010dasn\u011b p\u0159edpoklady k\u00a0tomu, aby se na\u0161e r\u016fzn\u00e1 setk\u00e1n\u00ed st\u00e1vala tak\u00e9 hlubok\u00fdm sd\u00edlen\u00edm, pln\u00fdm \u017eivota, otev\u0159enosti a porozum\u011bn\u00ed.<\/p>\n

\u201eKdy\u017e zpomal\u00edme, na\u0161e emoce dost\u00e1vaj\u00ed prostor pro to, aby prostoupily na\u0161i du\u0161i a roz\u0161\u00ed\u0159ily ji.\u201c[5]<\/a> Jedn\u00edm ze zp\u016fsob\u016f, jak vyj\u00e1d\u0159it, \u017ee druh\u00e9ho m\u00e1me r\u00e1di m\u016f\u017ee b\u00fdt prost\u011b i to, \u017ee my sami se trochu zklidn\u00edme. N\u00e1sledov\u00e1n\u00ed Krista dod\u00e1v\u00e1: \u201ePokojn\u00fd \u010dlov\u011bk je u\u017eite\u010dn\u011bj\u0161\u00ed ne\u017e \u010dlov\u011bk u\u010den\u00fd.\u201c<\/p>\n

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Vztah s\u00a0Bohem<\/em><\/p>\n

Dialog s\u00a0Bohem obohacuje n\u00e1\u0161 duchovn\u00ed \u017eivot a t\u00edm i n\u00e1\u0161 dialog s\u00a0dal\u0161\u00edmi lidmi. Doroteus z\u00a0Gazy \u0159\u00edk\u00e1: \u201eP\u0159edstavte si namalovanou kru\u017enici. Kruh p\u0159edstavuje sv\u011bt a jeho st\u0159edem je B\u016fh. Cesty lid\u00ed jsou jako paprsky: \u010d\u00edm v\u00edc jdou kup\u0159edu, t\u00edm v\u00edce se bl\u00ed\u017e\u00ed Bohu a jsou i navz\u00e1jem bl\u00ed\u017ee. A naopak.\u201c G. Ravasi dod\u00e1v\u00e1: \u201e\u010c\u00edm v\u00edce se lid\u00e9 p\u0159ibli\u017euj\u00ed k\u00a0Bohu, t\u00edm se st\u00e1vaj\u00ed solid\u00e1rn\u011bj\u0161\u00ed a \u010d\u00edm v\u00edce je spojuje vz\u00e1jemn\u00e1 l\u00e1ska, t\u00edm v\u00edc c\u00edt\u00ed Boha jako bl\u00edzk\u00e9ho.\u201c Jde tedy o to, abychom si vyp\u011bstovali \u201ekontemplativn\u00ed pohled, kter\u00fd se rod\u00ed z\u00a0v\u00edry v\u00a0Boha, kter\u00fd je tv\u016frcem a d\u00e1rcem \u017eivota, kter\u00fd stvo\u0159il ka\u017ed\u00e9ho \u010dlov\u011bka jako velk\u00fd div a z\u00e1zrak\u2026 Je to pohled, kter\u00fd vid\u00ed sv\u016fj \u017eivot i s\u00a0jeho hloubkou, vn\u00edm\u00e1 jeho nezi\u0161tnost, kr\u00e1su, v\u00fdzvu ke svobod\u011b a odpvo\u011bdnosti. Je to pohled \u010dlov\u011bka, kter\u00fd si nemysl\u00ed, \u017ee mu v\u0161e pat\u0159\u00ed, ale kter\u00fd v\u0161e p\u0159ij\u00edm\u00e1 jako dar a ve v\u0161em odkr\u00fdv\u00e1 odlesk Stvo\u0159itele a v\u00a0ka\u017ed\u00e9m \u010dlov\u011bku \u017eiv\u00fd Bo\u017e\u00ed obraz\u2026 Tento pohled nep\u0159est\u00e1v\u00e1 d\u016fv\u011b\u0159ovat tv\u00e1\u0159\u00ed v\u00a0tv\u00e1\u0159 nemocn\u00e9mu \u010dlov\u011bku, tomu, kdo trp\u00ed, kdo se ocitl na okraji spole\u010dnosti nebo na prahu smrti \u2013 podobn\u00e9 situace vn\u00edm\u00e1 jako apel k\u00a0tomu, aby v\u00a0nich odkryl n\u011bjak\u00fd smysl a pr\u00e1v\u011b tyto situace c\u00edt\u00ed jako pob\u00eddku k\u00a0setk\u00e1n\u00ed, k\u00a0dialogu, k\u00a0solidarit\u011b.\u201c<\/p>\n

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U\u010dit se ze zku\u0161enost\u00ed<\/em><\/p>\n

Jako m\u011b\u0159\u00edtko kvality na\u0161ich vztah\u016f m\u016f\u017ee slou\u017eit i to, zda se lid\u00e9, kte\u0159\u00ed s\u00a0n\u00e1mi \u017eij\u00ed, c\u00edt\u00ed v\u00a0na\u0161\u00ed spole\u010dnosti obvykle dob\u0159e. Petr \u0159ekl Je\u017e\u00ed\u0161ovi: \u201eV\u0161ichni t\u011b hledaj\u00ed\u201c. \u010clov\u011bk oste a zraje prost\u0159ednictv\u00edm ka\u017edodenn\u00edch zku\u0161enost\u00ed, a to i na poli osobn\u00edch vztah\u016f. Lid\u00e9 n\u00e1m docela \u010dasto d\u00e1vaj\u00ed p\u0159\u00edmou \u010di nep\u0159\u00edmou zp\u011btnou vazbu o tom, jak se c\u00edt\u00ed v\u00a0na\u0161\u00ed spole\u010dnosti (r\u016fzn\u00fdmi nar\u00e1\u017ekami, post\u0159ehy, kritick\u00fdmi pozn\u00e1mkami, \u2026). Pokud bychom cht\u011bli tento zdroj informac\u00ed o tom, jak se chov\u00e1me ve vztaz\u00edch, vyu\u017e\u00edt, je t\u0159eba se vyhnout obrann\u00fdm postoj\u016fm a nam\u00edsto, abychom se zapl\u00e9tali do diskuz\u00ed a ospravedl\u0148ov\u00e1n\u00ed se pokusit porozum\u011bt, co n\u00e1m druz\u00ed cht\u011bj\u00ed sd\u011blit. M\u016f\u017eeme se dokonce odv\u00e1\u017eit ot\u00e1zek typu \u201epro\u010d si to mysl\u00ed\u0161? co t\u011b k\u00a0takov\u00e9mu n\u00e1zoru vede?\u201c, \u201ev jak\u00e9 sitauci hlavn\u011b t\u011b tohle o mn\u011b napad\u00e1?\u201c.<\/p>\n

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Kde za\u010d\u00edt<\/strong><\/p>\n

Pokud se c\u00edt\u00edme na to, abychom zlep\u0161ili na\u0161e vztahy, kde lze za\u010d\u00edt (nebo: znovu za\u010d\u00edt)?<\/p>\n

Guardini l\u00ed\u010d\u00ed jeden vlastn\u00ed p\u0159\u00edb\u011bh: kdy\u017e jsem je\u0161t\u011b chodil do \u0161koly\u2026 jedna moudr\u00e1 \u017eena mi jednoho dne \u0159ekla: \u201epamatuj, \u017ee neexistuje jen velik\u00e1 l\u00e1ska k\u00a0bli\u017en\u00edmu, ale tak\u00e9 l\u00e1ska mal\u00e1! K\u00a0t\u00e9 velk\u00e9 jist\u011b jednou dojde\u0161, kdy\u017e pom\u016f\u017ee\u0161 n\u011bkomu ve velk\u00e9 nouzy, nebo bude\u0161 muset ust\u00e1t velik\u00e9 obt\u00ed\u017ee. Ale na malou l\u00e1sku je tu prostor v\u017edycky, na l\u00e1sku ka\u017edodenn\u00ed. T\u00e9 se \u0159\u00edk\u00e1 laskavost.\u201c<\/p>\n

Je u\u017eite\u010dn\u00e9 se zm\u00ednit o laskavosti, proto\u017ee je to ctnost, kterou v\u00a0\u017eivot\u011b pot\u0159ebujeme n\u011bjak vn\u00edmat: skl\u00e1d\u00e1 se z\u00a0\u0159ady drobn\u00fdch v\u0161edn\u00edch gest, ne\u010dekan\u00fdch, zato velmi mil\u00fdch, v\u00fdraz \u00facty a ohleduplnosti k\u00a0druh\u00e9mu. Zp\u0159\u00edjem\u0148uje n\u00e1\u0161 \u017eivot a br\u00e1n\u00ed, aby se z\u00a0n\u011bho stal z\u00e1pas o holou existenci: \u201euleh\u010duje n\u00e1\u0161 \u017eivot, kter\u00fd je \u010dasto ohro\u017eov\u00e1n z\u00a0tolika a tak nepochopiteln\u00fdch stran.\u201c. V\u00a0na\u0161\u00ed dob\u011b, kter\u00e1 se tak sna\u017e\u00ed \u201ez\u00edskat \u010das\u201c a v\u0161echno si rozpo\u010d\u00edtat tak, aby z\u00a0toho vyt\u011b\u017eila maxim\u00e1ln\u00ed prosp\u011bch, n\u011bkdy laskavost hyne na \u00fabyt\u011b. Laskavost p\u0159itom \u010dasto doprov\u00e1z\u00ed klid, dok\u00e1\u017ee naj\u00edt hodnotu ve v\u011bcech, kter\u00e9 se zdaj\u00ed p\u0159ebyte\u010dn\u00e9 a nefunk\u010dn\u00ed, miluje drobn\u00e1 a nen\u00e1padn\u00e1 gesta, nesn\u00e1\u0161\u00ed hekti\u010dnost.<\/p>\n

Laskav\u00fd \u010dlov\u011bk m\u00e1 pohled pro druh\u00e9ho, vn\u00edm\u00e1 jeho emoce, zn\u00e1 jeho pot\u0159eby a p\u0159\u00e1n\u00ed, v\u00ed o jeho obav\u00e1ch a co ho uv\u00e1d\u00ed do rozpak\u016f, rozpozn\u00e1 jeho \u00fanavu a dok\u00e1\u017ee to respektovat. Laskavost je schopn\u00e1 p\u0159edej\u00edt, p\u0159ej\u00edt nebo nebrat v\u00e1\u017en\u011b to, co j\u00ed na druh\u00e9m vad\u00ed; nechat ho svobodn\u011b d\u00fdchat; h\u00e1jit ho, je-li t\u0159eba; um\u00ed si zachovat odstup, kter\u00fd v\u00a0druh\u00e9m sou\u010dasn\u011b nebud\u00ed dojem opu\u0161t\u011bnosti; vstupuje do prostoru ciz\u00ed existence jemn\u011b a ohledupln\u011b; dok\u00e1\u017ee mile p\u0159ekvapit a b\u00fdt velmi nevt\u00edrav\u00e1. Laskavost si neplete bl\u00edzkost s\u00a0dot\u011brnost\u00ed. Laskavost je mil\u00e1 a zp\u0159\u00edjem\u0148uje \u017eivot, je um\u011bn\u00edm drobn\u00fdch gest, kter\u00e9 z\u0159ejm\u011b ovl\u00e1daj\u00ed \u017eeny l\u00e9pe ne\u017e mu\u017ei.<\/p>\n

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Z\u00e1v\u011brem dodejme: schopnost \u017e\u00edt dob\u0159e s\u00a0druh\u00fdmi lidmi m\u016f\u017ee b\u00fdt jist\u011b z\u00e1le\u017eitost dobr\u00e9ho vych\u00e1v\u00e1n\u00ed, ale je tak\u00e9 (a m\u00e1 b\u00fdt) plodem na cest\u011b \u010dlov\u011bka, kter\u00fd se sna\u017e\u00ed kultivovat vlastn\u00ed \u017eivot. Vy\u017eaduje bd\u011blost, abychom se pomali\u010dku neuzav\u00edrali do n\u00e1s sam\u00fdch, a\u0165 u\u017e z\u00a0\u00fanavy, strachu, nebo po p\u0159edchoz\u00edch \u0161patn\u00fdch zku\u0161enostech; vy\u017eaduje cht\u00edt<\/em> s\u00a0druh\u00fdmi komunikovat a p\u0159ekra\u010dovat bari\u00e9ry, kter\u00e9 jsme schopni ka\u017edodenn\u011b znova budovat mezi sebou a druh\u00fdmi lidmi. Tak\u00e9 \u0159eholn\u00ed komunity, podobn\u011b jako kn\u011b\u017esk\u00e9 semin\u00e1\u0159e, mohou samoz\u0159ejm\u011b \u017e\u00edt v\u00a0ovzdu\u0161\u00ed vz\u00e1jemn\u00e9ho odcizen\u00ed a individualismu, o kter\u00e9m mluv\u00ed L. Pirandello: \u201eJejich osam\u011blost byla takov\u00e1, \u017ee i kdy\u017e si byli tak nabl\u00edzku, p\u0159ipadali si navz\u00e1jem nekone\u010dn\u011b vzd\u00e1len\u00ed.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u00a0Aldo Basso<\/p>\n

\u00a0z\u00a0\u010dasopisu Testimoni<\/em> 6 (2011), s. 9-11 p\u0159elo\u017eila a upravila sd<\/p>\n


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[1]<\/a> \u201eKdo nemiluje sv\u00e9ho bratra, kter\u00e9ho vid\u00ed, nem\u016f\u017ee milovat Boha, kter\u00e9ho nevid\u00ed.\u201c 1J 4,20<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

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[2]<\/a> velikost Je\u017e\u00ed\u0161ova lidstv\u00ed v\u00fdborn\u011b p\u0159edstavuje nap\u0159. R. Guardini, La realt\u00e1 umana del Signore, Brescia 1970.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

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[3]<\/a> srov. J. Ratzinger, Fede Verit\u00e1 Tolleranza, Siena 2003, 17.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

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[4]<\/a> Benedikt XVI., Homilie pronesen\u00e1 v\u00a0Sulmon\u011b 4.7. 2010.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

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[5]<\/a> Michele Lacroix, Il culto dell\u00b4emozione, Milano 2002.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Na\u0161e mezilidsk\u00e9 vztahy z\u00edsk\u00e1vaj\u00ed na kvalit\u011b do t\u00e9 m\u00edry, nakolik se v\u00a0nich odr\u00e1\u017e\u00ed Je\u017e\u00ed\u0161ovo jedn\u00e1n\u00ed, pro\u017e\u00edv\u00e1n\u00ed a postoje.   Zku\u0161enost v\u00a0oblasti mezilidsk\u00fdch vztah\u016f p\u0159edstavuje jednu ze z\u00e1kladn\u00edch rovin definice psychick\u00e9 zralosti ur\u010dit\u00e9 osoby a z\u00e1rove\u0148 n\u00e1m ukazuj\u00ed jej\u00ed pokrok ve schopnosti milovat, co\u017e je podstatou svatosti.[1] Je tedy jasn\u00e9, \u017ee zp\u016fsob, jak pro\u017e\u00edv\u00e1me mezilidsk\u00e9 vztahy […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":13,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[8,21],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cestanahoru.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4105"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cestanahoru.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cestanahoru.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cestanahoru.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/13"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cestanahoru.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=4105"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.cestanahoru.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4105\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4106,"href":"https:\/\/www.cestanahoru.org\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4105\/revisions\/4106"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.cestanahoru.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=4105"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cestanahoru.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=4105"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.cestanahoru.org\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=4105"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}